dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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