shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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