I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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