I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Randomize
