Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Randomize
