She said her name was "party"
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Randomize
