Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
