PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Randomize
