the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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