Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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