I want to stick my p in your. b.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Randomize
