there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
apparently the secret to your success is patron
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize