So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
