oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
we're so committed to being not committed
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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