Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
The Olympian is in my bed
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
