Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
