Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
