singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
