I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
