I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
and i looked up. we had an audience...
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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