OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I AM VODKA MAN
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize