all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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