he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
