They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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