she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Randomize
