It's Friday. Sex?
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
why is half of my head shaved?
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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