I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I have feelings that need drinking.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize