I think I am morally bankrupt
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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