do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
