ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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