So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
