sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
