that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
