he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
