none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
