You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
