and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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