If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
