She said her name was "party"
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Randomize
