i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Randomize
