i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Randomize
