There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
