nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
We need to rekindle our bromance
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Randomize
