i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
