I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
