we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Randomize