I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
