Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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