about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
she peed on how many people?
This show inspires me to have sex in space
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
