Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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