What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize